tough times test your faith...

     Today as I was sitting at the hospital and reading one of Scilla's books about praying. I read something that I look at as confirmation to what I have been saying all along. I have said several times that sometimes God has to make drastic moves in our lives to get our attention; the book said "sometimes we have to go through difficult times to become closer to God and see his true purposes revealed". I found this very interesting because I had been praying for revelation and when my sisters accident first happened; God revealed to me that he was trying to get someone's attention and now I just need for him to reveal to me, who. It may even be more than one person's. It may be that he wants to use my sister as a testimony of faith and of his greatness to reach other people.

    Today at work, I was telling one of the parents about my sisters accident and I felt myself almost getting emotional. I was able to keep myself together, but I thought that I was over that part of the process.

      Today, I started a fast; I am fasting and praying for an accessible home for my sister and for strength. As she was practicing transferring from her chair to the car today; as she was taken for chest x-rays today; as she was transferred using the maxi lift today, I saw her struggle. I saw her determination. I saw her frustration. I saw her happiness. I saw so many emotions, both highs and lows.

     As I am becoming more actively involved in her care, I keep thinking "taking care of Scilla is going to be a lot of hard work; this is not going to be easy." I am almost afraid, because of course I want her to have the best care; but will we be able to give her that care?

        I know that God is awesome and tonight as I was showering (this is my time to talk and pray with God) I started to sing " We have come this far by faith, leaning on the Lord. Trusting in his holy word, He's never failed me yet. oh ooo ooh We've come this far by faith." I think that was God telling me that our faith in him has brought my sister, my family, my friends and I through this very tough and trying time. It is our faith and belief that what he says in his word; the very bible verses we keep turning to for strength and guidance through this test has become a testament of our faith, hope and belief. It serves as proof that we trust what he says in his holy word and that we do not doubt that he can perform miracles. I know that God can and he will do what he said; He is healing my sister, baby Emma, and little Ely everyday and if we look at what they have been through; what they are going through; you can't help but praise God for he has kept them. If God never does anything else for us, he has done enough already; and for that I am thankful...

"Walking in Faith..."